By
the time I reached Ludhiana railway station it was 6.30: PM and the Swaran
Shatabdi train to New Delhi was running on schedule. Its departure time was 6:55
PM. I gradually moved towards platform no. 1 which was over-crowded with passengers
and I started proceeding towards the front side of the platform so that I could
get some standing space. By the time the
train entered the platform, it was already 7 o’clock and I could see heavy rush
of passengers to board the train in front of every AC coach. I was waiting at
the entrance of my AC coach no. B2 when one middle-aged lady pushed me aside
and hurriedly boarded the train carrying two big suitcases in both her hands; the
entrance space was narrow and the suitcases were big; hence she could not move inside
the coach easily. Moreover, the suitcases were making it impossible for her to
move forward. People at the entrance gate were shouting and pushing themselves forward
to the door but couldn’t enter the coach. I requested the lady to first carry
one suitcase at a time with her and the second suitcase I took from her. Then, we
both entered the coach with great difficulty. It took three more minutes to
finally settle down in our respective seats. By this time, the train had left
the station and the service boy had already started distributing mineral water
bottles to those passengers who had boarded the train from Ludhiana railway station.
I had
visited Ludhiana town this morning by the same train but the objective of my
visit was badly hit as my purpose of the visit was totally defeated. Still, somehow,
I was trying to control my emotions but was failing in my attempts miserably. I
could pretty well feel the heat of my hypertension and the blood sugar level
which were moving north. On top of it, my co-passenger had further added to my
frustration by her adamant behaviour. I was trying to cool myself off without
having any positive solution in my mind. Suddenly, I woke up when the service
boy started serving tea and snacks in the compartment. I requested him to
provide me with the sugar free pouch. He obliged immediately with two pouches
of sugar free powder for my tea.
I
was enjoying my hot cup of tea when the lady sitting on the next seat offered
me her thanks and enquired about my destination. She was the same lady who had
trouble boarding the train with her two heavy suitcases. I politely accepted
her thanks and replied: “I am going to Gurgaon.” She instantly acknowledged: “me too” with a broad smile on her beautiful
face. She must be around fifty years of age, very fair, charming and gorgeous
looking. She was gifted with a heavy body structure with a very decent looking
personality. To continue the conversation she said - “I am going to stay with
my in-laws’ place at Gurgaon and tomorrow night I am going to catch a flight to
Canada. Before I could answer her question, she shooted another one: “You live
in Gurgaon or Ludhiana, Mr. Singh?” I answered her question and after a long
pause, I started narrating her the whole story of the day which had forced me
to flush out my whole day’s frustration in front of the lady whom I had met
just half an hour back, but I didn’t know why, the after effect of my utterances
were so soothing that I felt much relieved!
It
all started a month back when I first advertised for a suitable match for my
second daughter in an English national daily newspaper. The responses were very
encouraging and we short-listed five prospective matches. Out of these, the 5th
one was from Ludhiana - a B.TECH (Mechanical) with MBA (Operations), working as
a Product Development Manager in an automotive component manufacturing company
based at Chandigarh, and my today’s visit was to this boy’s house at Model
Town-Ludhiana.
The
initial talks were very cordial with the boy’s parents. They had in-fact
invited me to fix-up the date of the engagement and discuss other marriage
related formalities. Although we had met them once in Delhi where both my
daughter and their son had met and liked each other. I repeatedly asked them if
they had any demand and if so, I must know in advance. The boy’s father was decent
and politely brushed aside my worries by saying: “we don’t want anything from
you because our Lord has given us everything - we only need a decent girl for
our boy from a fairly cultured and decent family, that’s all.”
I
repeatedly asked the question of any demands etc. to them including the boy but
I got a similar reply from both father and the son. They both seemed extra-ordinarily
simple and sweet people. I was praying for this alliance to the God Almighty as
to me they appeared to be a cultured decent and gentle family.
Once
I briefly informed them that we want the engagement ceremony to be conducted at
Gurgaon first and then the marriage could be performed at Chandigarh or
Ludhiana as per their choice because we were comfortable with both the places. They
were too good and they had not objected to any of our suggestions. Also they
gave their consent for every proposal or suggestions offered by us. In the
beginning I was having some doubts but later I was convinced to accept them as
a fairly ideal family.
Only
the last week, I got an invitation from the boy’s father to come to Ludhiana by
the morning Shatabadi Express train so that they could discuss and finalize the
marriage related matters which included engagement ceremony, ring ceremony and the
marriage reception. They also assured me that they would pick me up from the
railway station and also drop me back in their car.
Therefore,
today I came by the morning train carrying with me five boxes of sweets, two
buckets of fruits, one box each of dry fruits and chocolates/biscuits/toffees
etc. I saw boy’s father standing at the platform holding a big bouquet of
flower, who welcomed me with a warm hug. The driver standing next to him took
all the things that I was carrying from my hands and offered me a bottle of
chilled mineral water for drink.
Within
twenty minutes or so, we reached their Model Town home. It was a double-storied
bungalow built on a 500 yard plot. I was being driven in a Honda city car and
one Toyota Innova SUV was standing at the portico of their house. At the
entrance door, the boy’s mother welcomed me with a broad smile. First they offered
me fresh fruit juice and later served varieties of sweets/snacks/biscuits and
at the end they served me with a cup of tea with separate milk and sugar pots.
I
was feeling awe struck seeing their style of hospitality. Moreover, the house
seemed to be very big, fully furnished, well decorated with all the material
goods to make life comfortable.
We
were discussing about the present political and industrial scenario of the
state when I saw the house lady entering the Drawing Room with a very serious
face. She straight-away came to the subject with a very blunt question - “Mr.
Singh, which model car you have decided to present to your daughter?” The house
owner warned the lady by saying: “Don’t you worry madam ji, Singh Sahib is very
intelligent, he must have planned something extra ordinary for his daughter,
isn’t it Sir ji?”
I
was taken aback; suddenly I got up from my seat and started staring at the lady
who had just hurled a bomb in front of me. Before I could answer her question,
she shot another arrow aimed at me loaded with heavy ammunition and this one
virtually pierced me tearing me to pieces. The pain was so severe that my mind,
body and soul started bleeding profusely on the lady enquiring about the status
of one 3-BHK fully furnished flat in Gurgaon which I was supposed to gift to my
daughter on her marriage.
I
was dumb-founded and finding it so difficult to speak at that very moment but
with great difficulty, all that I could utter was only one sentence -“Are you
asking for Dowry?” This time, the house lady started speaking rudely to her
husband in loud voice: “What did he say: Dowry” what nonsense is he talking? We
are not asking anything for ourselves; damn it, he will only give us one suit
each that’s all, but will definitely gift, a foreign make sedan Car, 3-BHK
furnished flat and foreign trip to his lovely daughter on her marriage; what’s
so new about it? All the girls’ parents do it - there is no big deal?”
With
lots of courage and confidence I finally told the lady with both my hands
folded: “Madam, I can’t give even a motor-cycle, forget about gifting a car to
my daughter. At present I am staying in a rented house in Gurgaon so how could
I offer a furnished flat to my daughter? Sorry, I can’t fulfill any of your demands
and moreover, I had repeatedly asked you in the beginning whether you have any
demand but you simply denied everything, and today you are presenting me with
such a long list of items which I just can’t afford and moreover your demands can’t
be met by me”
After
listening to my submission, the house lady started shouting at her husband and she
very rudely spoke to him in a very loud voice: “I told you not to contact these
service class people, they are worst than beggars, what can they offer us,
nothing, this relationship is over, just tell the driver to drop him at the nearby
bus stop, from where he will get an auto for station - you hear that.”
The
house lady went inside and her husband also followed her. I was still standing
at their Drawing Room totally confused not knowing what to do next. I didn’t
know when my eyes were filled with tears and with a very heavy heart I left
their house alone without talking to anyone. I slowly walked out of the house
and after walking for twenty yards or so, I got a rickshaw which dropped me at
the main road from where I got an auto-rickshaw to reach the railway station.
Somehow I
reached station but was still under the influence of today’s episode, something
like which had never happened in my life before. My eyes were still moist with
tears which were refusing to dry up and flowing uninterruptedly. Suddenly, I was
shaken up from a ring from my mobile phone. This was from one of my very dear
friend from Jamshedpur. In that moment I was not in a mood to talk to anyone or
take any call, but he being very dear I
could not muster courage to miss his call and picked up the phone to talk.
After exchange of courtesies, I started narrating to him about the incident
that had happened today. After hearing the story and a long pause, he asked me only
one question - “will you marry your daughter outside your community?” And my
answer was: “Why not, If the boy happens to be from a decent family?” He then
hung up saying “please wait for my call”.
I
got a call again from my Jamshedpur friend and this time he was very excited.
At the outset he said: “would you like to marry your daughter with my sister’s
son. The boy is educated, serving in New Delhi and belongs to a Brahmin family.
I could not believe his statement and enquired again: “Have you discussed with
your family members about my daughter and did they agree for a Punjabi girl. What
about dowry etc.???” His answers were in the affirmative as he specifically
mentioned ‘No Dowry’. He then asked me to forward the CV and photograph of my
daughter so that he could share the details with his sister.
Meanwhile,
I discussed this matter with my wife and daughter over phone and also forwarded
the details of my daughter to my friend. Within ten minutes I got all relevant
details of the boy on my mobile and within half an hour I got the approval and
acceptance from the boy’s family also. In between, my friend, whom I refer to
as “Anna” (which means elder brother in Tamil) and his wife (who happened to be
my Rakhi Sister) spoke to my daughter and asked about her consent, and my
daughter’s reply, was: “Whatever you, aunty (Anna’s wife) and my parents will decide
shall be acceptable to me.”
After
listening to my sad story the Canada going lady sitting nearby started showing
her empathy and even asked for my daughter’s resume and photograph so that she
could look for a suitable match in Canada. She was literally feeling very sad
and offered her honest consolation and prayers that everything gets settled
smoothly in my daughter’s life.
This
had happened just a month ago and today sitting at home while penning down this
story of mine, I am feeling deeply grateful to the God Almighty that finally
like fairy-tale story everything ends well, my tale also reached to a final
stage of re-union of two soul-mates with the help of a friend indeed; Anna who
had not only accepted my proposal but also decided to arrange my daughter’s
marriage with his nephew under his direct supervision.
Who
said - matches are made in heaven? Correct, but they are arranged here on this
earth by good friends and well-wishers like my most beloved respected friend Anna
who truly understood the feelings of a lonely helpless father in need of help
for his lovely marriageable young daughter and assisted in bringing together a
similar helpless parents in search of a beautiful bride for their handsome son.
With
Prayers
Gurcharan
