The biggest crime is breaking heart of your loved-one

The toughest part of any relationship is the knowledge and understanding of the first person regarding the behaviour, mood, nature and temperament of the second person. In this hi-tech environment of modern age, where distance has no relevance and anyone can become a friend with the person sitting on the other part of the world, where chances of seeing each other could be very bleak, rare and almost impossible. But still, we not only make friends, develop a long term relationships and go all along to maintain it very successfully.

A very close friend of mine always used to say: “A person must be rational in his/her behaviour. In case of any misunderstanding and/or miscommunication; they must speak with each other and try to resolve the issue amicably without hurting each other’s feelings and further making it more explosive at the end”.

It’s easier said than done. I have found out that many times the root-cause of the problem is negligible but our ego, misconception and biased approach clouds our mind, body & soul so vehemently that we take such a drastic and negative steps that not only end up our relationships but also make it traumatizing and painful for our dear friend, in particular.

I must say that sometimes even in our close relationships (family and relatives), we become so irrational, loud, violent and impractical that it becomes intolerable, painful and unbearable and our dear ones submit with dismay, disbelief and depression.

Today, when I look back and see the journey of last fifty years of my life, I see myself all alone walking in this cruel world and nobody is accompanying me. In-spite of having such a long list of relatives and friends, today I am dumped by everyone, have been left alone and carrying my cross on my own shoulders. After thorough analysis, I have come to the conclusion that, these are self-created problems and the not the ones created by Mother Nature. At the end of the day if any one is to be blamed, it’s me and me only.

I have kept losing good friends who were real assets of my life. It was their love and affection which made me multi-millionaire with their deep sense of belonging, belief, faith and trust. I have paid very heavy price to learn the secret of life that no relationship can survive on your defined terms and conditions.

It’s true that a person comes alone and has to go alone from this world, but till his last rites he is being accompanied by all his relatives and best friends. But I am sorry, when I look back from my present position, I see all along, empty roads behind me and no sign or trace of any human being; forget about relatives or friends.

I was feeling really very sad last night but still I was not ready to accept my faults which have made all my friends very annoyed, angry and detached from me, forever. What should I do my Lord and I started crying, I kept on crying for very long time and I went to sleep thereafter.

I don’t know for how long, but when I got up from my bed, I found myself in another world, which I have never seen before in my entire life. This place was built on a very high altitude. It was very big palace of white-marble, flooded with lots of lights all around. I could clearly see the moon & stars which were looking very bright and shining above in the clear sky.

Where have I been? I kept remembering that place but to no avail. After walking for some time, I found so many people at the back side of the palace. Some people were sitting on the ground in meditation and quite a few were walking in a slow motion under the bright moon light. I have also noticed one very strange thing, nobody was talking to each other and everyone was maintaining pin drop silence. The whole atmosphere looked like an ocean of peace.

Suddenly, I saw an elderly man sitting in the center of the ground on a marble platform. I moved towards him and sat down in front of him after paying my respects. His eyes were closed and he was under deep meditation. His face was looking radiant, glowing and his silver beard was very long and thick. He was wearing white robes and was looking very calm, peaceful and in quiet posture. I sat besides him for a very long time. After an hour or so he opened his eyes and pronounced: “I am sorry to keep you waiting for so long, what can I do for you, Charan?”

I told him that everyone in my life has left me alone and I am feeling very lonely, sad and unwanted. He smiled, looked at me with his bright eyes and gave me a very gracious look and said: “The biggest crime is breaking heart of your loved-ones. There is a provision of punishment for every kind of crime in the civil society. But no court of this world has the power to give punishment for breaking someone’s belief, confidence, love and trust. In my opinion, this is the biggest ever crime in human history; and its punishment will be your sincere apology, regret and asking for true forgiveness from the bottom of your heart.

Therefore, please go back to your loved-ones and ask for forgiveness from each and every soul whose heart you have broken. May God be with you and show you the right path.” The Saint showered me with his blessings, my whole mind, body and soul became very calm and quiet. At the same time, I felt a cool shiver in my entire body. I don’t know for how long I was in that state. The uninterrupted alarm woke me up at seven o-clocks in the morning. Suddenly, I was at my wits end and started wondering, what I saw last night was real or was it my sheer illusion?

It becomes more difficult, delicate and serious when you deal with your best friends. The basic difference between the two is; family is related to you and you are directly connected with them and sometimes dependent on you. Therefore, they tolerate your anger, arrogance, stupidity and torture, because they are attached with you socially, they have to live that relationship without any choice.

In friendship; one must not take undue advantages, benefits and favors; it must not have any hidden agenda, expectations, motives, objectives and purposes. It can’t be made one way traffic, to make it durable, flexible, sustainable, workable and long lasting relationship. First of all, you need to give everything unconditionally to your loved-one, without expecting anything in return.

Because the true friend always goes out of his/her way, means, capacity, capability, limit and strength to do every thing possible to make his/her friend’s life more comfortable, enjoyable, lovable, peaceful and trouble free, without expecting anything in return. If the need be, she/he will not hesitate for a second to sacrifice his/her life too for the sake of friendship. Therefore, I have decided by all means to be a good friend and good human-being.

With Prayers

Gurcharan